【教育專欄】良知和教育(3)

澳門導報官網澳門導報 发布时间:2020/01/03 点击数:

編者按:

每個人都有自己喜歡的生活方式, Diego 和 Anna很幸運,因為他們有著共同喜歡的生活方式。編者認為,這種生活方式給他們帶來的最大好處就是:“擁有整個世界”不再是一句空谈。諾大的世界就是他們的家,他們遊歷八方的經歷所產生的各種感受、世界觀、人生理念或許是顛覆性的,且極具震撼力。澳門導報希望把他們的經歷分享給廣大讀者(瀏覽連載請關注網站www.am-zm.com )

 

原創:Diego and Anna

作者:安娜•卡倫娜 Anna Caranta     

翻譯:Ayla櫻子

校對、編輯:Sicily、Diego

 

(续上期)

我聽到這些時,我的反應是這不就是關於如何教育孩子的箴言嗎?那就是無條件的去信任,信任孩子們有自己的潛在的傑出的能力,孩子們會在被信任的時間裡將它挖掘出來。那就是不帶任何期待、不盼望成果立馬實現的日常陪伴,不在鄰居面前展示他有多麼厲害,不再把自己的壓力,那些經由恐懼轉化而來的痛苦去抨擊他們,因為這本身就是不信任的佐證。   

通常會有父母困惱于他們的孩子不像其他人的孩子在滿周歲後就會講話或是學會走路,或是兩歲了都還在用尿不濕等等,他們認為他們的兒子或是女兒就應該學得很快,他們也很希望在他人面前展示他們的孩子是很棒的。但其實他們遲早都能學會走路、說話和不用尿不濕的,這只是時間問題。所以對孩子更好的方式是帶著平和的心,尊重他們的節奏,因為我們每個人生而不同。如果有些孩子需要比其他孩子更久的時間來學會走路,這不代表他們不行,也許他們正在發展其它父母還沒看到的技能。這種情況同樣也發生在學校的學習當中,比如在他們應該閱讀,或者算術的年齡。孩子們需要確信他們是不被大人懷疑的。因為孩子們需要通過內在的驅動力來學習東西,而這時候父母能做的就是在他們需要的時候搭上一把手。這樣他們會帶著鎮定和自信,以自己的步伐通向他們要走的人生之旅。

 

When I heard it, I thought it was a wonderful metaphor for parenting. That is trust. It is to know that our son or daughter has within theirselves extraordinary abilities, and that he/she will discover them over time. It is to accompany them without seeking immediate results, without having to show his success in front of the neighbors, without crushing them with our pressure that is the expression of our anguish and that, that anguish, that fear of his failure, is the proof of our distrust. There are fathers and mothers who are distressed because the baby does not speak as early as another's baby, or does not walk at twelve months, or uses diapers with two years... They feel that the baby should be faster, they want to be able to show others that their son or daughter does too. But sooner or later the baby will get on two feet; sooner or later he will talk and quit the diapers. Andwhat better way to do it with peace of mind, at their own rhythm, because we all are different. If some children take longer than another to walk doesnot mean that they are incapable, but that they are developing other skills that fathers and mothers still do not see. The same happen with school learning, the age at which they read, or solve mathematical calculations. The child has to feel that we do not doubt them. The child have to feel that learning comes out from an own dynamic, in which the adults extend the hand when the children need it. It is a path that he walks at his own pace, with tranquility, and confidence.


良知和教育(1)

良知和教育(2)

良知和教育(3)

良知和教育(4)

良知和教育(5)

良知和教育(6)

良知和教育(7)

良知和教育(8)